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Fatherless daughter syndrome

February 25, 2016

 

FREDEDREIA WILLIS WILLIS

News Editor | flw005@latech.edu

 

Those father-daughter dances, those moments after your first heartbreak, those daddy-daughter dates are just a few of the things girls like us miss out on.

 

Some people believe those moments are not as important, and a girl may not be scarred until adulthood or even a lifetime.

 

I believe that though a physical father on earth is needed for every girl, those of us who had to grow up without one are strong individuals.

 

We are strong because of the weak moments we had wondering if you were ever going to come take us to a movie or out for ice cream – you never came.

 

We are strong because we have watched our mothers, who had to be both the mother and the father.

 

Fatherless daughter syndrome is real and alive today.

 

Because of an absent father, we have a tougher time with relationships. We often unwillingly look at our partners as fathers. We look to be praised by a male since you were never there to give it.

 

We hope to be cared for by a male, because you never cared enough to stick around and teach us that we matter, we are beautiful and we are worthy.

 

But do not be sad, do not be sorry; we forgive you and we know that we are loved.

 

We understand that everyone makes mistakes, but after awhile, even the biggest coward must acknowledge his creation.

 

But as fatherless daughters, we thank you with sincere and genuine hearts.

 

Thank you for teaching us how to look for a guy who is willing to love.

 

Thank you for pushing us to pursue a man who is going to be a good father to our daughters.

 

We thank you for being absent (though our hearts are heavy) so that we may truly understand the cruelty of the world at such a young age.

 

We will never forget those moments waiting and wanting you to be in our lives.

 

We will remember those moments our mothers cried and tried so hard to be present because of your absence.

 

And the questions we fear, but want to hear you ask anyway, “Am I too late?” and “Am I forgiven?”

 

Yes, you are forgiven; yes, you are loved; and yes, you are too late.

 

You are too late to see the moments I shared that reminded my mom of you. You are too late to see the time everyone looked at me weirdly because I did something funny, which I inherited from you.

 

But you are not too late to see me walk down the aisle, with only strength on my arm where you would have been.

 

Frededreia Willis is a junior journalism major from Lake Providence who serves as news editor for The Tech Talk.

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